Observations..

What do you do when...
1. You chase a girl you like for slightly less than a year already and yet you know almost zilch about her.
2. You don't even have her home number.
3. You haven't even chatted to her on the phone before.
4. Only a very short date ( all because of the CB MA1505C)
5. You would want her to be your A rank friend or perhaps S rank (Special rank.. haha) but you might and most possibly be just a C rank friend to her.

That day (Sunday) I was awakened by my handphone because someone SMS-ed me. It was her.. wait.. OMG ITS HER! So as I usually like to fantasize what SMS she might send me, most of the time I try to conjure up the worse possible message so that I will like whatever I see. So I was thinking, ok... maybe she decided to remind me that she wanted to watch "The Runaway Jury" (provided she is free, which is isn't.. so .. ahh fark lah).

But this is too optimistic already so I'm thinking she must be in some kind of shit then will need to message me. This is her 2nd, only her fugging 2nd initiated message to me.. Yeah anyway, my hunch is normally quite zhun so it turns out she was at school, using her laptop but can't surf wirelessly. Ask me for HELP. I would like to help her but the problem is that she isn't that good at computers either so after a few SMS I got fed up and asked her to call me instead. Most of the time her reply will be "Cannot lah, this month talktime I exceed a lot liao..." or "I'm busy now. Gdnite =) "

Only in shitcases like this, she call me immediately... I don't think I'm super sensitive or what but her .. difference in attitudes and actions really cause me to re-examine my place in her heart. I think confirmed is rank D man.. C- at most...
So now recently I have become more and more reluctant to help those friends who I am not very close with. Fortunately you guys reading this are most likely to be outside of the "list". Hehe.. the army guys will know what I'm talking about.

Like my family, my dad and mum always come back from coffeeshop to tell me about stupid actions done by people who are 不自动. Like gobbling up other people's meals, shouting and abusing other workers verbally, crazy antics done by very normal people in everyday life. Then my dad and mum always have to 做好人, settle the dispute lah, try to make peace. At one point of time I really felt being "used" man. Occasionally I have to go to this temple near Mohd Sultan road to change dollar notes into coins which my dad will use for his business. So my cousin just mentioned to my father that he wanted a share of the coins too if there were extra. My dad readily agreed.. never mind... i don't mind.

So gradually my cousin wanted more and more coins for his business too! From just a bag of 50 cents, became 3 bags of 20 cent coins, 1 bag of $1 coins, 2 bags of 10 cent coins. To put things into perspective, a bag of $1 coins is worth $2000.
The rest is $500 except 50 cent coins which is 1K. After ferrying the coins from temple to the car, my biceps totally cannot make it already even though I got trolley. Its as if I just shifted the whole signal store from 1st floor to Warrant Officer bunk in 5th floor. So of course I gotta kao peh what! I tell my father its very jialat, my sister also said we shouldn't be doing this for my cousin. If its like a bag or 2 we don't mind but so much is ridiculous, the Subaru Impreza's suspension can only hold so much weight before scraping humps...

Being the typical 好人， my dad said "Haiyah you all cannot like that, when you all were young remember after we sold our house then had to put up at his place? Now our stall also under his coffeeshop leh, we have discounted rental fees, our house he also lent us money to pay off the downpayment.., actually 我们欠他要算其实是很多。。你们不可以忘恩。。。
What he said is true but hey, was I ever given a choice to reject his "kindness"?
When my mother wanted to buy the house we're staying in now, I was the only one who objected. Then now, work so hard, complain that their backs ache, their necks are strained, what can I do? Its really 自找 what.. how else would you put it? I can only offer back massages and help out whenever I can.. but to be tied as a "slave" to an unwritten contract, sorry man, I only have my finger to offer you.

Moral of story: I am no longer a 好人。。 so don't ask me for help unless you came from Nanhua, 42SAR Signal Bunk 2, or you're BB offering me sex. Ok the last one was out of point but ... in today's context, being a good guy isn't necessarily that good anymore. What a long rant.. bleah~